Breathing Life - Joshua Roy's Blog

Often we are the last to notice an internal change or “shift” that has occurred inside ourselves.  When I work with others I look for internal “shifts” and changes that occur.  The beauty about change is that it is visible, if one knows what to look for, and how change will manifest itself.  Predominately change will show up on a person’s face and in their physiology.   Due to the unique nature of human beings, the manifestation of psychological “shifts” shows up differently for each individual.  I have been observing “shifts” in people for many years now.  This awareness is learned and all can develop this ability.   In my occupation I often need to deal with aggressive and angry people.  I see the “shifts” happen in these individuals prior to their becoming aggressive.  There are signs that people give prior to ‘acting out’, that warn others of their intentions.  We can learn to become attuned to these signs and this is important if we want to remain prepared and safe.  Learning to read these signs comes with experience, and sometimes that experience is a result of pain and discomfort.  What we use in this instance is “sensory acuity”.  We…

I was looking on Facebook recently and an article was posted that was a test for technology addiction.  It was offering a large sum of money to those who could live apart from technology for an extended period of time.  It had a picture of a log cabin in the woods.   There are those who consider that the need to feed this addiction outweighs their want for material possessions.  In other words it is a battle of Will power.  The mind is willing and yet the flesh is weak.   For those who are dependent on technology for connection with friends, family and the world it may be a difficult thought.  If you rely upon the phone, iPad or other device to validate you as an individual, this test may actually be difficult, or even seem impossible.   Those that have no addiction to technologies, such as Wifi, Internet, computers and mobile phones would consider a time to be away from these a welcome break.  Some even said that they would remain in the Log cabin indefinitely so long as food and other essentials kept coming.   There is a new branch of psychology that deals directly with gaming…

I spoke with a man who stated that he continually makes jokes about other people in front of them that are inappropriate. These jokes are far from malicious as he is a wonderful man and really cares for others, however he described that there is a switch in his mind that is activated when he makes an attempt to draw people close to him. What ends up happening instead is that he can offend and hurt others feelings, thereby causing distance in his interpersonal relationships. These actions are born of insecurity. Rather than silence he feels the need to speak to fill that silence. As I was listening to him describe this situation I recognised a need to be accepted, loved and connection with other people. Offending people in this way is antisocial. While innocent in his intent, the fact remains that this need for love and connection is driving him to speak and act in adverse ways, and this is producing the opposite effect in his world. Once trust is broken and offence received he has to work twice as hard to reestablish this connection with others. I wanted to help and decided that a swish pattern could be…

I was working with a woman this morning who is very happy, excited and motivated.  She has clear goals and a vision of her future.  She is confident, committed and driven.   She had no doubt that she could achieve her financial goals.  She had no doubt that she could achieve her physical health goals.  She had no doubt she could complete her relationship goals and all the areas of her life.     Why on earth would she invest her time with a life coach?  It seems unnecessary, right?  I mean she is achieving success and happiness.  She has developed her personality and talents.  She is learning and growing.  What then could a life coach offer?   Life coaching is not just for the downhearted and depressed.  I have worked with those dealing with separation and divorce.  I have provided coaching for the overweight and financially destitute.  Life coaching is obviously for a person with many obstacles and challenges to overcome.  What about a person who seems like they are succeeding in every area or aspect of life.  What can life coaching possibly do for such a person?   Firstly.  Wake up.  No one on this planet has it all…

We all have beliefs around money.  There are beliefs around the making of money.  Beliefs around the spending of money.   Here are some beliefs about money that many relate to.   1/         There is never enough money. 2/         you need to have money in order to make money. 3/         its not spiritual to have too much money (you must decide between rich or happy). 4/         you have to work too hard to make money. 5/         I’m just not good with money. 6/         my family has never been rich. 7/         money does not grow on trees. 8/         its selfish to want a lot of money. 9/         money is a limited resource. 10/        the rich get richer, the poor get poorer.   The rich have different beliefs.  Here are some examples.   1/         I can buy anything I want. 2/         my money works for me 3/         wealth creation begins in the mind. 4/         making money is easy. 5/         Passion pays.   Most people can identify with one prevalent attitude concerning money.  The need for more of it. There are many things that we need and want and the solution tends to always be a need to generate more cash flow.  A need…

Did some work with a woman who refused to resolve an issue during the first session. There was strong resistance. This resistance has been causing her to remain stagnant. Her progression halted to a stop, and she was unable to let go of her past. She had learned that “Love” was the highest positive value for the part of herself that wanted great physical health. She also learned that “Love” was the highest positive value for the part of her that wanted to eat poorly and use food as a means of comfort. In both cases her unconscious mind revealed that love was the desire of her heart or the highest positive value for her life, and the symbolic representation of this was an image of a brain. In the movie “the matrix”, Morpheus explains to Neo that there is a difference between knowing the path and walking the path. One may pose the question. Why would she not walk the path, when the way is open before her? What would cause a person to reject the unification, and integration of knowledge that would alleviate an internal conflict. Why would anyone knowingly hold on to an internal conflict when that…

I invited a good friend to be part of my morning routine.  During part of this routine we engage in affirmations with movement.  As this friend began to speak he moved his body in powerful ways and asked that his Maker would use him in powerful ways.  He concluded with the words, “I will be your ripple effect”. Whatever you are. Whatever you do. Whatever you say, people are watching. I recall Steven covey the author and leadership expert once said, “Who you are speaks so loudly it does not matter what you say”. Others get a sense for who we are and what we are, even before we open our mouth. When we do speak, our words are confirmed by what we do and how we act. What we say is secondary. Inconsistency between words and action will let others know we cannot be trusted and are not reliable. While human beings fall short of perfection, there is no excuse for not striving to improve the current situation. There is no excuse for not even striving to increase your capacity to love, forgive, overcome and move forward with hope. There is no excuse pretending you are doing well whilst sitting stagnant….

My Karate instructor would regularly repeat the phrase “Pain is just an emotion”.  I was lying on my back with my knees up and my karate instructor was standing nearby.  I knew what was coming next.  I saw him do what he was about to do many times before to senior grades in the Karate class.  Now that I had joined their ranks it was time for me to receive intense abdominal training.   I was 15 years old.  We had just completed a couple of hundred sit ups, and when I saw him step to my side I flexed my abdominal muscles as hard as I could.  I then saw my instructor jump as high as he could into the air.  He then landed on my stomach heels first.  I felt the impact and it hit like a sledge hammer.  Wind escaped my lungs and I might have even farted.  There was also pain.  It hurt a lot to have that type of impact hit my body.  Thankfully the pain did not stay, and due to the conditioning work that we did I was able to withstand this heavy impact.   This is just one example of body conditioning…

As I have spoken to people of all ages and of all different walks of life one recurring theme continually finds its way into conversation.  This theme is HEALTH. Teens constantly talk about Abs.  The boys and girls want well defined and flat stomachs.  They want the type of HEALTH that will give them exceptional ‘Selfies’, and a stunning body. Young adults want to be in great shape to attract the girl/guy of their dreams.  They want to look and feel great to impress the opposite sex.  To turn heads and break hearts. The middle age want the HEALTH to keep up with energetic and hyperactive children.  They want health that enables them to work and then be there for their family.  To still have energy after a long day at work, so their family will receive all of the love and care they deserve. The older generation want HEALTH to prolong their lives.  To be able to enjoy association with their children and grandchildren for many years. HEALTH is really a subject in which everyone wants something.  Some want more ENERGY.  Others want greater levels of FITNESS.  Other want greater STRENGTH.  Others desire more FLEXIBILITY in stubborn joints.  Others…

It has long been believed and taught that it takes 21 days to create a habit.  In 1960 Doctor Maltz a plastic surgeon published a book called Psycho-Cybernetics which sold more than 30 million copies.  Dr Maltz explained in his book that it took about 21 days for a person who received plastic surgery work, to become accustomed to the changes.  Furthermore according to Maltz, one who had a limb amputated experienced a phantom limb for about 21 days until they adjusted to their new life. Further recent studies have suggested that habits take much longer than 21 days and can take months.  In one study conducted with 96 people it was discovered that it took an average of 66 days to make a behaviour automatic. Now, I have been interested on how to create the greatest possible outcome in the shortest amount of time.  I know it is the nature of mankind to do things faster and better.  To find ways of accelerating learning, and forming a habit is most certainly a form of learning. I therefore have asked myself the question.  Can a habit be formed in one day? My answer is ABSOLUTELY. I will tell you why…