The belief continuum.
Breathing Life , Confidence , health , Influence , Life , success , value / April 29, 2017

I had a friend visit come to me on Sunday and tell me he had a headache.  He told me that it had been with him all day and that he could not seem to shake it. I was happy to help.  We used 3 techniques and the headache was completely gone. As I have thought about this experience I have come up with 4 steps that ensure that you will eliminate pain from your body. 1/ First he came and asked for help. 2/ He believed that the process would work. 3/ He did the process in a positive way. 4/ The first technique did not fully resolve the issue, so I had him continue to work and utilised a 2nd and a 3rd technique. What do we learn?  1.  Ask for help.  If you want to get past something, you may not have the tools and beliefs to overcome it on your own.  Often we can lean on someone who has a different level of knowledge and experience.  This requires humility and a realisation that we do not know it all.  Sometimes this will also cost us time, money, effort and energy.  It may cost us our pride and ego. 2.  Believe…

SEX SEX SEX
honesty , Imagination , success / April 13, 2017

Advertisers have spent years understanding the relationship between sex and the functions of the brain. Sex is tied to our primal instincts and is a function of the lizard brain. Many are not aware at we have three brains, not just one. There is the lizard brain or the paleo cortex, the mammalian brain, and the new brain or Neo cortex. Sexually stimulating pictures, stories and sounds affect the mind in a huge way. The lizard brain is located at the tip of the spine. It is directly connected to the nervous system of the body. This is why when a person is sexually stimulated there are very intense feelings that permeate the body. Even if the body is not moving and you are in a resting position, when exposed to sexually stimulating material the heart rate will accelerate, adrenaline can enter the body and tiredness can be dispelled. Advertisers are aware that by exposing men to sexual images and provocative sounds, feelings of excitement, adrenaline and euphoria are created. In this way, they are able to link those feelings to their product or service. The unconscious mind may falsely associate the product or service being advertised, to the stimulated…

Whatever you do, DON’T SMOKE.

Smoking in 2016 has got to be the most unrewarding experience that I can think of.  Take away the social aspect and what is left? I was working with a client who expressed her desires to quit smoking.  During the session I had her list and write down the benefits of smoking.  This she did and there were a couple of minor benefits that she could link to smoking.  However when we weighed these against the disadvantages of smoking a huge imbalance became evident. It took me only a few minutes to dissemble the benefits of smoking, and to show her how to fill the same needs in a positive healthy way. All that remained was a long list of disadvantages.  She was ready to make the changes and for the re-patterning process to be installed directly into her unconscious mind. An interesting concept that I taught was that in order to take control of this addiction, she needed to choose to either shrink the addiction or alternately grow bigger, or outgrow the addiction. As I considered these two approaches and thought about their implications, my mind was drawn to two different schools of thought.  The first is the concept…

Technology Addiction and delayed gratification.

I was looking on Facebook recently and an article was posted that was a test for technology addiction.  It was offering a large sum of money to those who could live apart from technology for an extended period of time.  It had a picture of a log cabin in the woods.   There are those who consider that the need to feed this addiction outweighs their want for material possessions.  In other words it is a battle of Will power.  The mind is willing and yet the flesh is weak.   For those who are dependent on technology for connection with friends, family and the world it may be a difficult thought.  If you rely upon the phone, iPad or other device to validate you as an individual, this test may actually be difficult, or even seem impossible.   Those that have no addiction to technologies, such as Wifi, Internet, computers and mobile phones would consider a time to be away from these a welcome break.  Some even said that they would remain in the Log cabin indefinitely so long as food and other essentials kept coming.   There is a new branch of psychology that deals directly with gaming…

Mastering Appetite
Example , Fitness , Life , Life Choices , Possibilities , Uplifting / January 16, 2016

In a previous Blog I explained that I spent some time with a woman who was struggling with a long-term weight issue.  She was not mastering appetite like she wanted to in her life. “Hi Josh after the work we did last Sunday I have had a fantastic week. My husband & I are getting along really well and our relationship is very positive.  Another thing that has happened is that my time with my son and our relationship has improved our favorite time of the day is bath time and reading time we love to cuddle up with a good book:) also I have gone to my boss and increased my hours of work because I know I can do it and I do love it! Food is no longer an issue for me I don’t have cravings anymore and I feel free and know that my body wants the best foods for me. I have been looking at food differently as medicine that can either harm or heal so I’m choosing to eat healing foods. My emotions have been more even and I recognize and can stop unwanted emotions and can create new emotions in their place. This…

A slave to appetite

Had a profound and wonderful experience with a young woman who had struggled for many years with an eating disorder.   This woman stated that when she was about 7 years old she made a decision based on a thoughtless comment made by another person.  At this time she decided that she was large, and began living into this belief as a fundamental principle of her life.  From that time she had constantly struggled with weight, and this issue was having a major impact on her health and life. The first thing that I did was a process called parts integration.  Through this process she learned that the part of her that wanted healthy appetite and living was subservient to the part of her that wanted a pleasure filled appetite of eating unhealthy and sugary foods.   In other words the desire to eat unhealthy food was greater than her desire to treat her body with the love and respect it deserved, by eating satisfying and good foods.  She realised that this had created internal conflicts within herself. She said, “I recognise that I have been giving myself mixed signals.  My mind and body has been doing exactly what I have been telling it to do”….

Anger Strategy resolved. It was a piece of cake.

I spoke with a teenage girl who stated that she is always fighting and getting into yelling arguments with others, including her mother, her cousin, and other people in her life.   Her justification for being confrontational is that she hates others telling her what to do.  This is an issue for her now in her life, yet in the future it could also be an issue if she someday works for a boss.  The reality is that most of us need to be able to respond appropriately when being told what to do.   I decided to do a process with her in which we considered her strategy for getting angry in communication.   I compared the strategy of getting angry with the strategy of baking a cake.   I explained her that if she wanted to bake a cake she would gather ingredients, order and sequence those ingredients, place it in the oven and wait for the cake to cook.  If those ingredients were incorrect, or the time in the oven was too short or too long then the cake would be a flop.  Too much opening of the oven door in anxious expectation, and the cake may…

Are you letting food seduce you this holiday season?

Who does not like cakes?  A good cake is very desirable.  It will tantalize the taste buds, put a smile on your face and create a party in your mouth.  Social gatherings, parties and events all have one thing in common. People gather around to chat and enjoy a slice of your favourite cake, filled with the sugary goodness.   It is a compelling and almost irresistible thing to watch others indulge in delicious sweets and goodies.  What’s more, when you are offered a piece it is difficult to resist.  It is also hard to resist that second piece that needs to be finished off.  If the serving size is particularly large we think to ourselves ‘just this once’, or ‘I will burn it off with exercise’, or ‘I have to be sociable/polite/gracious’ etc.  This would not be an issue of course if this were a once off treat.  If there was a very small amount of processed sugar in our overall diet our body would handle this with ease.  If it was not for the compelling impulses of our sugar addiction, we could withstand the look of this type of food without excruciating effort.   When the holidays arrive…

The struggles of ADDICTION

The struggles of ADDICTION   I was working with a man who struggled to separate Love from Sex.  He described that both seemed to him to be one and the same.  He described that when he had sex he felt loved.  When he was rejected sexually, he felt unloved and/or unlovable.   Therefore he had a rule in his life that sex equalled love.  One of the fundamental needs that we have as human beings is the need to be loved.  This led him towards a sex addiction.  He thought that he wanted/needed sex, when he was actually wanting/needing love.  This is not uncommon for one with similar addictions.   Addiction can be very strong, and the roots of addiction very deep.   There is a prevalent thought in the world that “once an addict, always an addict”.  I choose to believe that this statement is completely false.  It is my experience that when an addict is shown another way, that addiction, or any addiction can be overcome.  When the addict chooses another way to meet the need inside themselves, and consistently follow this new way, life will change.  The person simply needs to attach enough pain to the addiction,…

Transforming negative emotions
Breathing Life , Confidence , Influence , Love / November 30, 2015

We all have a need to be loved.  This is one of the fundamental needs that each human being shares.  What happens when we feel unloved?  When we feel unloved, and this feeling is reinforced over time, we can find ourselves in a very lonely place.  The feeling of not being loved can lead to the making of negative choices.  When we feel unloved we may sabotage our relationships.  When we feel unloved we may act and behave in ways that are immature or inappropriate.  When we feel unloved and then “act out”, and doings so can cause us to feel even worse.   It is a very negative spiral. I had a conversation with a man who explained that when he felt unloved he would spiral into negative patterns and negative behaviours.  He struggled with addiction and found that his life had become unmanageable at certain times in his life.  Furthermore he found that this feeling of being unloved seemed to start a negative spiral.  Something negative would happen and he would respond by feeling that he was not loved.   While in that negative place he would feed his addiction in an attempt to feel better, and act inappropriately.  This…

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