I met a man in his mid-20’s who had survived a terrifying horror in his life.

Firstly he told me about a severe football injury.  He had experience temporary paralysis.  He explained that recover took about 6 years, and that he still struggled to carry heavy objects.  He found it difficult to function and yet appeared healthy.   As we were speaking I felt a feeling in my body that indicated that he and I were in rapport.

He and I were breathing in unison, we were both siting and he was telling me stories about his life.  It felt really good to be there in rapport with him, and we connected immediately. The beauty of rapport is that people open up and are able to share very personal information, and feel a sense of trust.   Rapport in this case made this conversation heartfelt and meaningful.

I felt on this occasion that I should do nothing but listen.  He spoke for about 30 minutes.  He shared experiences from the heart and full of emotion.  At one point he stated “you are only the 3^rd person that I have ever told this to”.  I was honoured that he would open up to me and share a story so close to his heart.

I could relate to him on an emotional level.  He was confident, honest, playful and funny.  He had overcome tremendous obstacles that seemed to dwarf my life’s challenges by comparison.

He had been to a terrifyingly negative place for several years from late teens into his early 20’s.  One example of this was the desire to murder individuals, and/or groups of people.  He described several episodes where he felt an almost uncontrollable rage attack his body.  He described to me a disconnection from his own body, and a feeling that his body was not his own, and that he was being controlled by another entity.  He described to me voices in his mind, and how the voices were telling him to do unforgivable things.  He also felt a compelling need to follow this voice, as he believed that this would make the internal pain disappear.

There was intense pressures for him to action these desires, and yet he never did.  Finally he described how he was led to friends, who were able to show him a way out.  He stated that his life from that moment changed.  He said, “the voices are now gone and the desires that were destroying my life…gone”.  Tears filled his eyes as he completed his story, and thought about how his life may have been different if he had at any point chosen a different path.

When we consider such a dramatic change, it gives me confidence for myself and others.  Most of us have far less dramatic challenges, and cannot even fathom such destructive desires.  Hearing of one who has succeeded to this degree lifts my expectations for myself and those whom I coach and help.  The capacity required to create a shift such as this is Inspiring.  This man is an exceptional human being and is someone whom I greatly admire.