Breathing Life - Joshua Roy's Blog

I had a friend visit come to me on Sunday and tell me he had a headache.  He told me that it had been with him all day and that he could not seem to shake it. I was happy to help.  We used 3 techniques and the headache was completely gone. As I have thought about this experience I have come up with 4 steps that ensure that you will eliminate pain from your body. 1/ First he came and asked for help. 2/ He believed that the process would work. 3/ He did the process in a positive way. 4/ The first technique did not fully resolve the issue, so I had him continue to work and utilised a 2nd and a 3rd technique. What do we learn?  1.  Ask for help.  If you want to get past something, you may not have the tools and beliefs to overcome it on your own.  Often we can lean on someone who has a different level of knowledge and experience.  This requires humility and a realisation that we do not know it all.  Sometimes this will also cost us time, money, effort and energy.  It may cost us our pride and ego. 2.  Believe…

Why do I prime? Firstly I have a believing heart, and I have been told in the past by one I would consider wise that certain actions produce certain results. That seems very evident and almost third grade. When I hear a statement like this from one who is wealthy, happy, content and fulfilled, then I will listen and then model what they themselves have done. I attended an event in September 2015 with Tony Robbins. The event was unbelievable for me. I used so much energy as I really wanted to get an extreme amount out of the event. Therefore my investment was tremendous. I really do not think I have ever invested so much effort and energy to one event ever in my life. Considering my diet, I amazed myself and others in the auditorium. Others appreciated the level of energy that I displayed. Prior to the event I read the words to the effect, “one can be excited for a day or a week, but to be excited for 20 years will give you the life of your dreams”. I read this quote and immediately thought to myself. “Impossible”. I thought about the emotions that I experienced…

I have done previous posts on matching and mirroring and in order to appreciate this post it would be a good idea for you to check out former posts.  I also have a video on my site in which I give two examples in building rapport using matching and mirroring. Sending a text message or email is a less effective communication strategy. This seems to be the preferred way for young people to communicate.  The reason this is less effective is because words alone can be significantly misinterpreted.  I recall sending a funny text once to a friend.  This text message was misinterpreted and the friend became offended.  You see all the person got was a written message.  I sent it as a joke, yet the receiver had no way of knowing that I was joking.  As I was writing the joke I said it in a funny way in my own head, and then laughed at how funny I thought the joke was.   Unfortunately the joke did not work and I can only assume that the person read with a very different tone in their mind.  I have wondered how the same message may have been received had…

I met a man in his mid-20’s who had survived a terrifying horror in his life. Firstly he told me about a severe football injury.  He had experience temporary paralysis.  He explained that recover took about 6 years, and that he still struggled to carry heavy objects.  He found it difficult to function and yet appeared healthy.   As we were speaking I felt a feeling in my body that indicated that he and I were in rapport. He and I were breathing in unison, we were both siting and he was telling me stories about his life.  It felt really good to be there in rapport with him, and we connected immediately. The beauty of rapport is that people open up and are able to share very personal information, and feel a sense of trust.   Rapport in this case made this conversation heartfelt and meaningful. I felt on this occasion that I should do nothing but listen.  He spoke for about 30 minutes.  He shared experiences from the heart and full of emotion.  At one point he stated “you are only the 3rd person that I have ever told this to”.  I was honoured that he would open up to…

Have you ever had someone have a breakdown in front of you?  It happened to me this week.  I was with a woman in her early 20’s and she had been given some terrible news.  I helped her to understand the news and what it meant for her, and how it would affect her life over the next several days.  She did not take the news well and showed this by her body language.  She began to weep and cry and say “What.  What.  That can’t be right.  I’ve done nothing wrong”.  She hysterically began to repeat the word “No”, over and over again. As I watched her behaviour I decided to use matching and mirroring. Immediately I copied her body language by crying.  I stood opposite to her, where she could see me and I held my arms up to my face just as she was doing.  I then said, “What.  I don’t know.  I just don’t know.  I don’t know what they will do.  I am new here”. When I was speaking I used the same distressed tone of voice that she had used when she spoke. The result was interesting.  At first I thought that she would…