Pattern interrupt using matching and mirroring

Have you ever had someone have a breakdown in front of you?  It happened to me this week.  I was with a woman in her early 20’s and she had been given some terrible news.  I helped her to understand the news and what it meant for her, and how it would affect her life over the next several days.  She did not take the news well and showed this by her body language.  She began to weep and cry and say “What.  What.  That can’t be right.  I’ve done nothing wrong”.  She hysterically began to repeat the word “No”, over and over again. As I watched her behaviour I decided to use matching and mirroring. Immediately I copied her body language by crying.  I stood opposite to her, where she could see me and I held my arms up to my face just as she was doing.  I then said, “What.  I don’t know.  I just don’t know.  I don’t know what they will do.  I am new here”. When I was speaking I used the same distressed tone of voice that she had used when she spoke. The result was interesting.  At first I thought that she would…

Salt and Light
Breathing Life , Confidence , Example , Influence , Life , Purpose , Uplifting / November 23, 2015

The story teller informs us that we are to be like salt and light. Salt adds flavour to food, and it a key ingredient to ensure food tastes great.  Salt also preserves food and makes the food last.  If there is too much salt or no salt, food may be inedible. To be like salt in the world would therefore mean to allow ourselves to live overtly in that we enable others to learn of our lives, hopes and dreams.  Just as salt ads flavour and value to food, our lives should add value to others. A lamp or bulb should be placed in a prominent, unobstructed position in order to give light.  The story teller explains that one would not put a light under a bush. As I have considered how it is possible for a person living in these times, in our current world to be like salt and light, I have realised that the example of how we live and what we do from day to day speaks volumes if we are indeed living with purpose.  To hide our gifts and talents would be to live a covert life.   We should develop our talents and gifts, and…

Infinite and Eternal – the mind of man
Imagination , Possibilities , Uplifting / November 22, 2015

Scientists’ look out into the universe and have been baffled by the mystery and expanse of space.  High powered telescopes continue to evolve and space appears to be unlimited.  Each time scientists reach the limits of the telescopic range, the question is posed, “What is beyond that”.  It would seem that space is infinite.  If there was an end or limit, what is on the other side of the outer limits? Consider one of the estimated 86 billion neurons in our brain.  Magnify on of these neurons 100 times.  What is found is more parts with more names.  Then if you take one of those parts and magnify that 100 more times.  There are more parts with different names.  When does magnification end?  Once again this process is infinite. If life is infinite in the expanse of space, and infinite in the cellular or molecular level of the body, then is it difficult to consider the infinite capacity in our brain. Scientist have made incredible discoveries in relation to the mind of man.  Mans’ capacity to learn knowledge, to gain understanding and develop wisdom. Researchers estimate that we use between 1 and 10 percent of our brain.  Though this is…

Tools to help with Anxiety and Depression

I spoke with a young woman who has suffered Anxiety and Depression.  This may be circumstantial due to her current situation. Things will be changing for her in the near future and therefore we had a conversation about that future. First I asked if she could see a vision of the future. She responded that she could see it, and described herself in a car with friends singing away as loud as she could. They were all laughing and having a great time. (Vivid imagination – WOW). She sounded very happy as she described this scene. I asked her to continue to describe how she had felt and what she heard. She described feelings of joy and happiness. She described laughter and sounds of Joy. After listening I decided to see if I could assist her to enhance the scene in her mind. I asked her to make the picture she described as big as a house and bright like the sun. I asked her how this felt. She could hardly communicate with me as she imagined the picture enlarged and bright. I then asked her to turn up the sounds in her mind. The music, the laughter and the…

Communication Breakthrough

Tonight I concluded the fifth life coaching session with a client. Whilst he had made good progress, I was still striving to see a transformation occur in him. The work that I am interested in, is making changes at the unconscious level. We had communicated about and he had a good understanding at the conscious level yet he was boxed in by the boundary conditions of his own thinking. He was unable to apply the skills because the issue was not lack of skill. The issue was not lack of ability. He is a brilliant man. He has a great marriage and loving family. He experiences good health and high energy levels. He is in a good financial position. He came to me in relation to the only area of his life that he felt was lacking. This area was communication. He had learned throughout his life that if you work hard at any problem, it can be conquered. This approach had worked in all other areas of his life. Yet in this one area of his life, (communication) it seemed that it was not working. He was attentive and made notes. He was completely involved in the exercises that we did,…

Feeling “GREAT” – Being Authentic

Yesterday a work colleague was asked how he was by a visitor and he said the word “great”. Whist he used a positive word in his answer, it really lacked the energy that the word would tend to inspire. The word was flat and without life. The word was free from any tonal inflection. The word was bereft of energy. The word was lifeless. I turned and stated to him that this was the most inauthentic thing I had heard all day. The word was in-congruent with his facial expression, his tone, volume and body language. To that he smiled, and I saw a light come into his eyes as he threw his arms into the air and shouted “GREAT”. This time his energy level was sky-high. The volume was far greater and his face was animated. He was being authentic when he said it this time.  He grinned and then after doing this simple gesture began to laugh. The person that he had said “GREAT” to looked stunned as his reaction was so unexpected. This added to the humour of the situation. He and I both used this simple gesture to energise each other for the rest of the…

I am living my purpose in life

On the 31st I had my first introductory seminar for Access World Seminars.  I had put in tremendous effort and was very prepared for the seminar.  In the morning I began in my usual way of doing some breathing exercises, visualising light going into my body and giving gratitude. As I sat down for breakfast I felt a spiritual feeling go all the way through my body as I thought about the introduction seminar.  I really feel blessed and grateful to be able to share information that has had a huge impact on my life.  I also feel that I am living my purpose in life, and I believe that there is nothing better in life than to live each day striving to fulfil that purpose.

Example can have a profound effect on others

In 2010 I looked at my stomach and thought it was time to regain my 6 pack abs.  I worked out like crazy and certainly this made a little difference however that little podgy belly continued to hang on.  I was 34 years old and thought to myself that this stomach was there to stay.  After many hours of exercises I realised that there was really nothing more coming off my stomach so I gave up, accepting that I would always have a fat belly.  After all I was heading toward my mid to late 30’s and how could I possibly have the fitness levels, or physique that I had as a younger man. Resigned to this fact I gave up on working out and slimness and instead began to bulk.  I decided to do weight lifting and to put on some muscle and size.  I greatly increased my food intake.  After doing this for a couple of years I had increased the size of my arms, chest and back considerably.  I also increased the size of my belly.  Then I got an injury on my right bicep and was unable to train for a time. I felt tired and…