He was crouching, lurking in the corner of the room like a creature of the night.

I did some neurological repatterning with a young man of about 24 years old.  This young man had experienced a difficult childhood, and as a result he was struggling to cope with everyday life.  He had made some choices that made it difficult for him to cope in certain situations.  One of these situations was an unexpected or unwelcome touch on his body.  This action would trigger feeling of betrayal that he described as a blue feeling that stated in the middle of his chest and shot into his arms and body.  It left him feeling empty and angrily visually fixated on whatever he believed had caused it.   I found this out as he was telling me about his challenges and I shouted “be healed”, while putting my hand on his head like a priest in the Pentecostal faith.  (Neurological shock).   His reaction was immediate and aggressive.  He wanted to assault me and I could see the hatred he was displaying was out of this world.  He squeezed his fists and his eyes narrowed on my.  I just watched patiently.  It appeared like he was fighting against the temptation to attack and kill me.  He moved over away…

The sad state of loneliness
Breathing Life , Communication , Love , Uplifting / March 5, 2016

As we travel through life each of us has to deal with feelings of loneliness.  These feeling may result from loss of a loved one, separation from friends or a situation in which a person may feel disconnected from people in their lives. Relationships are vital to our feeling connected with others and enjoying a happy and productive life.  It is interesting to me that some men and women comment that they do not have any friends.  They do not really know how to connect with other people, or how to establish a long term relationship.   Others can connect with other people in the short term, however they feel like they cannot maintain a long term relationship.  For yet others there seems to be no necessity in their mind to connect with others.  There is no driving passion compelling them to have rich friendships. Wherever you are on your journey in life, if there are ever feelings of loneliness, I believe that this feeling is prompted by a yearning in our soul to have deep and rich relationships. I have learned about really connecting with the people in our lives.  What I have recently become aware of is that experiences…

Why we do workshops and not lectures.

The following paragraph is an excerpt taken from the internet that explains retention rates of learning through lectures and other forms of teaching.   “The experts generally agree that simulations boost learning retention rates dramatically. An often-cited study conducted by the NTL Institute for Applied Behavioral Sciences in Alexandria, Va., found that on average, students retain 5 percent of what they hear in lectures, 10 percent of what they read, and 20 percent of what they see and hear in audiovisual presentations. But add “practice by doing” and “teach others/immediate use” and retention rates shoot up to a jaw-dropping 78 percent.”   Much of traditional education is based on lectures.  The practical application of any learning is imperative to integrating that learning into one’s mind and heart.  The challenge from a teaching standpoint is to learn how to increase learning of the students to such an extent that massive change can occur in the shortest amount of time.   It is the nature of mankind to do things faster and better.  Improvements have been made in both travel and communication.  Once it took many months to send a message to the other side of the earth or to travel around…

Saying dumb stuff

I spoke with a man who stated that he continually makes jokes about other people in front of them that are inappropriate. These jokes are far from malicious as he is a wonderful man and really cares for others, however he described that there is a switch in his mind that is activated when he makes an attempt to draw people close to him. What ends up happening instead is that he can offend and hurt others feelings, thereby causing distance in his interpersonal relationships. These actions are born of insecurity. Rather than silence he feels the need to speak to fill that silence. As I was listening to him describe this situation I recognised a need to be accepted, loved and connection with other people. Offending people in this way is antisocial. While innocent in his intent, the fact remains that this need for love and connection is driving him to speak and act in adverse ways, and this is producing the opposite effect in his world. Once trust is broken and offence received he has to work twice as hard to reestablish this connection with others. I wanted to help and decided that a swish pattern could be…

The Ripple effect.

I invited a good friend to be part of my morning routine.  During part of this routine we engage in affirmations with movement.  As this friend began to speak he moved his body in powerful ways and asked that his Maker would use him in powerful ways.  He concluded with the words, “I will be your ripple effect”. Whatever you are. Whatever you do. Whatever you say, people are watching. I recall Steven covey the author and leadership expert once said, “Who you are speaks so loudly it does not matter what you say”. Others get a sense for who we are and what we are, even before we open our mouth. When we do speak, our words are confirmed by what we do and how we act. What we say is secondary. Inconsistency between words and action will let others know we cannot be trusted and are not reliable. While human beings fall short of perfection, there is no excuse for not striving to improve the current situation. There is no excuse for not even striving to increase your capacity to love, forgive, overcome and move forward with hope. There is no excuse pretending you are doing well whilst sitting stagnant….

Dry Nights

Dry Nights, Bedwetting is a major concern.  According to recent studies about 80 percent of children cease wetting the bed by the age of 5.  Of the remaining 20 percent some will continue to wet the bed for years.  For some bedwetting can continue into the teenage years and even adulthood. In fact the older the child gets the more need for intervention and psychiatric help and assistance.  Experts tell us that the in the absence of a pattern of bladder control, the child will continue to have problems and that these will generally not be resolved without some form of intervention. Mechanical pads, alarms, psychiatrist, psychologist and other professionals may be relied on to assist. When you encounter this issue, you should consider the assistance of a life coach.  I will tell you why. The cost of pull ups is very high.  Over months and years you could spend thousands of dollars.  $$$$$$.  The cost of trained medical professional may take weeks or months to slowly work through all the underlying issues associated with the challenge.  This too will cost.  $$$$$$. A peak performance life coach will stamp out the issue in one session. Let me share with you…

Thanks! – Did you just accept that praise?

I was working with a man who was visiting with me and was interested in all the material that I am using and sharing.  He was interested in learning the sciences of Neuro Linguistic Programming (NLP), Neuro Associative Conditioning (NAC), and Neurological Re-Patterning. I have been studying this information for the last several years and only recently had I really began to teach others how it all works.  Prior to this I was feeling that I did not know enough and that I was not ready.  These beliefs were impeding my progress and causing me to accept a standard of life that was far below what I knew that I was capable of.  (My new beliefs are I know all that I need to know to create powerful lasting change in the lives of others, and I am absolutely ready for the world to know who I am). Finally I am now living and sharing this information and having great success everywhere I go.  I commented just this week to my father that “I do not fail”.  I said to him, “I don’t know what has happened to me and I have never experienced anything like this before in my…

Communication – Is your’s effective?

I have done previous posts on matching and mirroring and in order to appreciate this post it would be a good idea for you to check out former posts.  I also have a video on my site in which I give two examples in building rapport using matching and mirroring. Sending a text message or email is a less effective communication strategy. This seems to be the preferred way for young people to communicate.  The reason this is less effective is because words alone can be significantly misinterpreted.  I recall sending a funny text once to a friend.  This text message was misinterpreted and the friend became offended.  You see all the person got was a written message.  I sent it as a joke, yet the receiver had no way of knowing that I was joking.  As I was writing the joke I said it in a funny way in my own head, and then laughed at how funny I thought the joke was.   Unfortunately the joke did not work and I can only assume that the person read with a very different tone in their mind.  I have wondered how the same message may have been received had…

Have you done your Emotional Stretching today?

As a life coach it is imperative to be in PEAK condition.  By creating immense happiness in one’s own life, we inspire others to create it in theirs.  I am the happiest that I have ever been in my life, and this is because I constantly create a flood of positive emotions in my own body.   The old saying is true that “you cannot lift another soul until you are standing on higher ground than he is”.  In order to lift another person in the area of physical health and fitness, one would not choose a lazy coach.  Just as an athlete must fuel their body appropriately, so too should a life coach.    Just as one would expect a good financial adviser to be prosperous, one would expect that a life coach applies principles of financial success.  Furthermore just as a relationship expert should have strong relationships, so too should a life coach.  It is also relevant in the area of spirituality.  As we develop a strong spiritual life we can assist others to find their purpose in life and live into a bright and compelling future.   The best way to learn is to model behaviour.  The best…

Pattern interrupt using matching and mirroring

Have you ever had someone have a breakdown in front of you?  It happened to me this week.  I was with a woman in her early 20’s and she had been given some terrible news.  I helped her to understand the news and what it meant for her, and how it would affect her life over the next several days.  She did not take the news well and showed this by her body language.  She began to weep and cry and say “What.  What.  That can’t be right.  I’ve done nothing wrong”.  She hysterically began to repeat the word “No”, over and over again. As I watched her behaviour I decided to use matching and mirroring. Immediately I copied her body language by crying.  I stood opposite to her, where she could see me and I held my arms up to my face just as she was doing.  I then said, “What.  I don’t know.  I just don’t know.  I don’t know what they will do.  I am new here”. When I was speaking I used the same distressed tone of voice that she had used when she spoke. The result was interesting.  At first I thought that she would…