The Bar for a Man.

I was doing a priming session with a friend today and we were discussing focus and energy. He has just commenced a new relationship and is very excited about it, and focused on it. This is a great thing, and he is really enjoying the friendship and love that he is creating. He is focused so much on this relationship that it has taken up all of his time. He is not currently employed or studying and is solely enjoying the relationship.  This heavy investment into the relationship is creating a situation in which he has depleted most of his savings.  Reality struck home when he realised that the funds were getting low, and he needed some extra money for upcoming events and challenges. The bar for a Man is to be a leader, lover and provider. Whilst he is hitting the mark by being a lover, this is only one of the three areas in which he needs to take care of if he is going to be truly happy, and if he is going to have a happy partner. As an excellent lover, he is able to provide love and tenderness to his girlfriend, however this alone will not put…

Are you afraid to fail?

There are three resistors to mental effectiveness. They are fear, laziness and limited self-belief.   I wanted to write a little about fear. In particular the fear of failure. Fear can be good or bad depending on the context.  Fear can keep us safe, but fear can also prevent us from achieving our potential.   Fear of failure in business can cause one to shy away from making an attempt, taking risks, or having a go. Failure can lead to financial setbacks, or great loss such as foreclosure, or bankruptcy. Many people have started businesses, only to go out of business.  Fear stops people from taking out a loan to grow the business, spending money on advertising or employing staff. Fear can and will keep you from getting started, and fear can also keep the business small.   Fear of failure in relationships may prevent us from being open to the possibility of a relationship.  Those in a relationship may find that they unconsciously self-sabotage that relationship, or reject the other person first, for fear that they themselves will be rejected.  Failure to meet our responsibilities in a relationship may likewise be costly. If we neglect our relationship in the pursuit…

Children and Family – how can I do it all.

I heard a magnificent talk that really caused me to reflect on my own family. It caused me to consider just how important, deserving and wonderful my own children are.  Often my career aspirations, goals, ambition, and other interests demand my attention and focus.  At the same time I know that my immediate family relationships, my wife and children should be central in our lives, and must receive attention and focus.   The reason I say this is that money will come and go. Often work colleagues come and go. Success in work, or ability to make lots of money will satisfy in the short term, yet I know that long term fulfilment is best when there is someone to share it with. My goal is to have a fantastic and rewarding career, to have a strong and healthy body, and to have an empowering mission and purpose in life, whilst maintaining a strong and happy home.  I do not want to achieve success in career, to the detriment of my family.  One wise man said, “No success in life can compensate for failure in the home”.   Climbing the corporate ladder, and spending more time at work, and even…

Be sure your ladder of success is against the right wall.
Confidence , Example , honesty , Influence , Life , Life Choices , money , Purpose , success , value / February 19, 2017

I recently read a quote from Albert Einstein that said, “Try not to become a man of success, but a man of value”.  As I have considered this thought I comprehended that success does not come by focusing on success.  Many people believe that income or wealth is the predominant measure of success.  It is true that financial mastery is a measure of success, however there are many who are successful, or feel successful regardless of their level of wealth.  After all, financial well-being is only one aspect of life.  Therefore if one is successful in their finances, it is folly to automatically assume that this person is successful. Success in one’s career, does not translate to success in life.  I have learned that money, relationships, health and purpose all play a role, and collectively contribute to happiness and success.  If a wealthy person is unhappy the reason may be that they had leaned their ladder of success against the wrong wall.  The rich suffer from anxiety, just like middle class and the poor.  The rich suffer from depression, just like the middle class and the poor.  This is because happiness is based on values, and if you focus on…

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