Recognising change.

Often we are the last to notice an internal change or “shift” that has occurred inside ourselves.  When I work with others I look for internal “shifts” and changes that occur.  The beauty about change is that it is visible, if one knows what to look for, and how change will manifest itself.  Predominately change will show up on a person’s face and in their physiology.   Due to the unique nature of human beings, the manifestation of psychological “shifts” shows up differently for each individual.  I have been observing “shifts” in people for many years now.  This awareness is learned and all can develop this ability.   In my occupation I often need to deal with aggressive and angry people.  I see the “shifts” happen in these individuals prior to their becoming aggressive.  There are signs that people give prior to ‘acting out’, that warn others of their intentions.  We can learn to become attuned to these signs and this is important if we want to remain prepared and safe.  Learning to read these signs comes with experience, and sometimes that experience is a result of pain and discomfort.  What we use in this instance is “sensory acuity”.  We…

Saying dumb stuff

I spoke with a man who stated that he continually makes jokes about other people in front of them that are inappropriate. These jokes are far from malicious as he is a wonderful man and really cares for others, however he described that there is a switch in his mind that is activated when he makes an attempt to draw people close to him. What ends up happening instead is that he can offend and hurt others feelings, thereby causing distance in his interpersonal relationships. These actions are born of insecurity. Rather than silence he feels the need to speak to fill that silence. As I was listening to him describe this situation I recognised a need to be accepted, loved and connection with other people. Offending people in this way is antisocial. While innocent in his intent, the fact remains that this need for love and connection is driving him to speak and act in adverse ways, and this is producing the opposite effect in his world. Once trust is broken and offence received he has to work twice as hard to reestablish this connection with others. I wanted to help and decided that a swish pattern could be…

Let out the excitement

I was working with a woman this morning who is very happy, excited and motivated.  She has clear goals and a vision of her future.  She is confident, committed and driven.   She had no doubt that she could achieve her financial goals.  She had no doubt that she could achieve her physical health goals.  She had no doubt she could complete her relationship goals and all the areas of her life.     Why on earth would she invest her time with a life coach?  It seems unnecessary, right?  I mean she is achieving success and happiness.  She has developed her personality and talents.  She is learning and growing.  What then could a life coach offer?   Life coaching is not just for the downhearted and depressed.  I have worked with those dealing with separation and divorce.  I have provided coaching for the overweight and financially destitute.  Life coaching is obviously for a person with many obstacles and challenges to overcome.  What about a person who seems like they are succeeding in every area or aspect of life.  What can life coaching possibly do for such a person?   Firstly.  Wake up.  No one on this planet has it all…

The Ripple effect.

I invited a good friend to be part of my morning routine.  During part of this routine we engage in affirmations with movement.  As this friend began to speak he moved his body in powerful ways and asked that his Maker would use him in powerful ways.  He concluded with the words, “I will be your ripple effect”. Whatever you are. Whatever you do. Whatever you say, people are watching. I recall Steven covey the author and leadership expert once said, “Who you are speaks so loudly it does not matter what you say”. Others get a sense for who we are and what we are, even before we open our mouth. When we do speak, our words are confirmed by what we do and how we act. What we say is secondary. Inconsistency between words and action will let others know we cannot be trusted and are not reliable. While human beings fall short of perfection, there is no excuse for not striving to improve the current situation. There is no excuse for not even striving to increase your capacity to love, forgive, overcome and move forward with hope. There is no excuse pretending you are doing well whilst sitting stagnant….

Creating Habits fast

It has long been believed and taught that it takes 21 days to create a habit.  In 1960 Doctor Maltz a plastic surgeon published a book called Psycho-Cybernetics which sold more than 30 million copies.  Dr Maltz explained in his book that it took about 21 days for a person who received plastic surgery work, to become accustomed to the changes.  Furthermore according to Maltz, one who had a limb amputated experienced a phantom limb for about 21 days until they adjusted to their new life. Further recent studies have suggested that habits take much longer than 21 days and can take months.  In one study conducted with 96 people it was discovered that it took an average of 66 days to make a behaviour automatic. Now, I have been interested on how to create the greatest possible outcome in the shortest amount of time.  I know it is the nature of mankind to do things faster and better.  To find ways of accelerating learning, and forming a habit is most certainly a form of learning. I therefore have asked myself the question.  Can a habit be formed in one day? My answer is ABSOLUTELY. I will tell you why…

Dry Nights

Dry Nights, Bedwetting is a major concern.  According to recent studies about 80 percent of children cease wetting the bed by the age of 5.  Of the remaining 20 percent some will continue to wet the bed for years.  For some bedwetting can continue into the teenage years and even adulthood. In fact the older the child gets the more need for intervention and psychiatric help and assistance.  Experts tell us that the in the absence of a pattern of bladder control, the child will continue to have problems and that these will generally not be resolved without some form of intervention. Mechanical pads, alarms, psychiatrist, psychologist and other professionals may be relied on to assist. When you encounter this issue, you should consider the assistance of a life coach.  I will tell you why. The cost of pull ups is very high.  Over months and years you could spend thousands of dollars.  $$$$$$.  The cost of trained medical professional may take weeks or months to slowly work through all the underlying issues associated with the challenge.  This too will cost.  $$$$$$. A peak performance life coach will stamp out the issue in one session. Let me share with you…

Thanks! – Did you just accept that praise?

I was working with a man who was visiting with me and was interested in all the material that I am using and sharing.  He was interested in learning the sciences of Neuro Linguistic Programming (NLP), Neuro Associative Conditioning (NAC), and Neurological Re-Patterning. I have been studying this information for the last several years and only recently had I really began to teach others how it all works.  Prior to this I was feeling that I did not know enough and that I was not ready.  These beliefs were impeding my progress and causing me to accept a standard of life that was far below what I knew that I was capable of.  (My new beliefs are I know all that I need to know to create powerful lasting change in the lives of others, and I am absolutely ready for the world to know who I am). Finally I am now living and sharing this information and having great success everywhere I go.  I commented just this week to my father that “I do not fail”.  I said to him, “I don’t know what has happened to me and I have never experienced anything like this before in my…

The Love of my Daughter!

My daughter was visiting and we had many special and wonderful experiences together. On the camping trip we played cards together and I laughed so hard that it hurt. The enjoyment of that time will forever live as a highlight in my mind. During the holidays, she had injured herself and I took her to the hospital and stayed for several hours with her while the doctors treated her. We learned that she tore a muscle in her upper thigh. She was in tremendous pain and was given an injection for the pain, yet there was little else that could be done. There was also a time where my daughter invited the family together so that she could share with us her feelings and dreams for herself and for each of us. That was an amazing experience and there was a richness of love and joy created. Every single person spoke and we listened to each individual person for about an hour. Another special time was where my daughter and I sat and spoke for a couple of hours. During the conversation we really connected on a deep level. We spoke about life and choices. We spoke of joy and love. We spoke of the future and the past. It was…

A slave to appetite

Had a profound and wonderful experience with a young woman who had struggled for many years with an eating disorder.   This woman stated that when she was about 7 years old she made a decision based on a thoughtless comment made by another person.  At this time she decided that she was large, and began living into this belief as a fundamental principle of her life.  From that time she had constantly struggled with weight, and this issue was having a major impact on her health and life. The first thing that I did was a process called parts integration.  Through this process she learned that the part of her that wanted healthy appetite and living was subservient to the part of her that wanted a pleasure filled appetite of eating unhealthy and sugary foods.   In other words the desire to eat unhealthy food was greater than her desire to treat her body with the love and respect it deserved, by eating satisfying and good foods.  She realised that this had created internal conflicts within herself. She said, “I recognise that I have been giving myself mixed signals.  My mind and body has been doing exactly what I have been telling it to do”….

How much will you invest?

When most people hear the term investing, they immediately think of money. They may think of investing in real estate or shares, or in other ventures. I would like us to consider investing in another way. I have been asked to MC several weddings and functions and each time I have fully invested of myself. On one occasion I was asked to help run a live auction. This was a very new prospect, as I had never run a live auction. I therefore took it upon myself to prepare for this auction. I really wanted to do a great job and provide entertainment, laughter and be competent and proficient at running this auction. I could have attended and hoped for the best, however I am someone who has learned over the years that preparation precedes performance. Therefore I prepared myself by using YouTube to see several examples of live auctions. I had my iPad in the bathroom and spent about an hour just watching and learning from other auctioneer’s. I then began practicing the skills. Rolling my tongue, rapid clear speech, rhythm and tempo of the calls. Practicing the numbers forward and backwards. I also did a number of voice…